From WWE.com:
Daniel Bryan called out Triple H
Daniel Bryan still hasn’t gotten his “YES!” from Triple H. It’s certainly not for lack of trying, though; less than an hour before his planned battle with Batista, the submission expert took to the ring and vowed to “hijack Raw” until The King of Kings accepted his WrestleMania 30 challenge. And yet again, Bryan’s demand was met with the same response from The Authority: That he was a “B+ player” unworthy of The Game’s attention at WrestleMania.
Bryan wasn’t deterred in the slightest, though, standing toe-to-toe with The King of Kings in a war of words until Stephanie McMahon demanded Kane come out to remove Bryan from the ring. This isn’t exactly Bryan’s first rodeo in dealing with The Devil’s Favorite Director of Operations, though. The “Yes!” man happily engaged his old tag team partner in a knock-down brawl outside the ring until security and officials pried the two apart and sent Bryan back to the locker room … for now.
Kane 3 March 2014 – Daniel Bryan confronts The Authority: Photos
So yeah, there’s all the yadda, yadda, yadda – haven’t actually seen the show yet, but this is the same rather tired build for anything nowadays. You’d think WrestleMania as the flagship PPV would deserve better.
And while I’m in the mood to be bitchy – sheesh, you’d think a woman with the kind of money Steph McMahon has would have better hair. A decent haircut, access to hair care products not bought at a cheapie outlet mall, and a hairdresser who could give her a decent styling to flatter her face. Because dayum, that hair is awful! In comparison, DBryan’s is nicer!
“McMahon orders Kane to come to the ring.”
Oh my … kinda like the pale tie look. But damn, his hair is growing in more, and I no longer have the urge to ruffle it!
“Bryan attacks the WWE Director of Operations.”
-snickering- The phrase “He’s got a wild hair up his ass” has never seemed more apt!
“McMahon calls for security as Bryan pummels Kane.”
Wow, complete herd of zebras … errr, referees out there!
“Security pulls Bryan off Kane.”
All of which is actually making DBryan look like a credible threat … so it’s gonna be a complete clusterfuck when they have Triple H beat him at ‘Mania. Which we all know will happen, because there’s no way Triple H is gonna put DBryan over.
“And stay out!” McMahon orders.
Because she’s the one with the power. Triple H is her handbag with a bad buzzcut. And dear jesus, those shoes of Steph’s are another example of how money can’t buy good taste …
Kane’s cute, playing wary of DBryan though!
WWE.com has the video here – frankly, I’m not watching, because there’s a limit to how much of Steph’s screeching I can take. 😉
Again, from WWE.com:
Daniel Bryan def. Batista via Disqualification
Who wins when a goat battles an Animal? No one for now, thanks to a small army of intruders that turned Daniel Bryan’s match against Batista into an all-out brawl that ended in indecisive fashion. Despite Batista’s assertion that Bryan’s “YES!” Movement was the most ridiculous thing he’d ever seen, the submission expert served notice to a No. 1 contender that seemed more concerned with WWE World Heavyweight Champion Randy Orton at ringside than defeating his opponent.
Bryan went immediately after the knee of the much larger Batista to soften him up for a half-crab, though The Animal countered with a clothesline that nearly knocked the beard off Bryan’s face. Bryan reciprocated with a missile dropkick, but The Authority’s arrival threw the “Yes!” man off his game and allowed Batista to hurl Bryan into an unsuspecting Orton. The Viper replied by attacking Bryan (which disqualified The Animal) and instigating a scrum between Batista, Bryan, Orton and The Authority that culminated in a defiant Bryan receiving a Batista Bomb and, finally, a Pedigree from Triple H, who proclaimed he was tired of Bryan’s “fantasy.”
Given his reaction, it seems that Bryan’s WrestleMania dream will remain just that … at least for the moment.
Show of hands: who’s actually buying that this isn’t leading to a ‘Mania match? Yeah, that’s what I thought. DBryan’s gonna get lumbered with the match Punk walked out over. He’ll do a brilliant job of it – hell, he’s doing a brilliant job now, as the guy Triple H won’t push. Art imitating life and all that, but honestly, they’re lucky Punk walked, because this is working so much better with DBryan in the role.
Kane 3 March 2014 – Daniel Bryan vs. Batista: Photos
Botchtista vs DBryan – really? Man, DBryan could wrestle rings around this guy when he was in decent shape. Now? Bowling shoe ugly. And he’s got the main event at ‘Mania … great.
There’s one caption that sums up what’s wrong with WWE right now: Batista is the No. 1 contender to Orton’s WWE World Heavyweight Championship.
This is apparently one of the main reasons Punk took his bat and ball and went home – and I can’t say I blame him. WWE has tried this once, with The Rock. Who is WAY more popular that Botchtista. And John Cena had all those brilliant promos about how The Rock said he was coming home … and then wasn’t there the next week. How The Rock quite literally phoned in a performance via satellite, rather than show up in person. And how the guys who did show up each and every week, for TV and for house shows, who schlepped their asses all over the country night in and night out for the fans, had a right to be pissed that The Rock was getting a free pass to ‘Mania.
Okay, I can buy that WWE wanted The Rock back for two ‘Manias was because they knew people would buy the joint out three times over to be able to say they saw The Rock, now that he’s retired.
But fucking Botchtista? Who’s paying to see him? He’s not The Rock, for fuck’s sake! He’s got a part in a Marvel movie that may well be terrific (I’m sure we’ll be going to see it, because my hubby is a comic book nerd, and the trailer looks a bit amusing), but is he honestly a drawcard?
No. Not even close. Not when they’ve got The Hulkster, brother! People are gonna pay big money to see him, make no bones about it. So why wheel out another retiree and give him a title shot? Except that he’s friends with Triple H, and the WWE has no qualms about selling its soul to make a buck – witness the atrocity that is the upcoming Scooby Doo movie tied to WrestleMania.
Okay, getting off my soapbox now [/end rant]
Nope, quick bounce back onto it to say, fuck off, WWE – leave the bloody ads for the WWE Network out of the digitals!
“Bryan wins by disqualification after Orton interferes.”
“WWE Director of Operations Kane gets involved in the action.”
Well, he tries – nice drop kick, DBryan!
Dear gods, Kane has superlatively wonderful legs! And love the tailoring on that suit too …
And damnit, there he is, shooting his cuffs in the corner – that’s HAWT!
“The Animal hits Bryan with a vicious spear!”
And Kane gives us his surprised face – which is totally adorkable!
DBryan is down, Triple H gives him the “I’m tired of your crap!” spiel, and DBryan kicks him in the head! Which is all kinds of awesome!
Which led to @TheMattFowler including this brilliant GIF in his Wrestling Wrap Up -giggling!-
Triple H then strips down for action – which is in no way, shape or form even one millionth as sexy as when Kane does it – and hits DBryan with a Pedigree. Yay.
Triple H and Kane survey the situation.
Pats points out that those pants of Kane’s are almost indecently well-fitted. And that he has no VPL. Which made me laugh like an absolute loon! And yes, she’s right – he doesn’t!
“The Authority stands tall at the close of Raw. Will Bryan continue his quest for a match against Triple H at WrestleMania 30?”
Meh, who cares? We’re getting to see Kane in a suit, looking simultaneously hawt and adorkable – I’m happy!
WWE.com has the video here enjoy!
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The Brothers of Destruction 